Problem #1 I didn't sleep last night. Nothing new, I never sleep, not through the night anyway. I am always tired and therefore, everything else suffers. It sucks and I am taking action today to make it change but it still might be an adjustment.
Problem #2. Work. Dave's company was bought out and our amazing benefits aren't going to be so amazing anymore. It sucks. Just as I am finally starting to make our money work for us, it is all going to change and I hate it. WA WA WA I know I am just complaining, we will still have it better than most but when you only pay $10 a month for insurance anything more is hard to swallow.
Problem #3. My kids are growing up. I know, inevitable, but still I can be sad if I want to. What made me think about it this morning was this letter I read. It is amazing and I will use it because I am thinking this will be the last year Cait believes in Santa. I just didn't know how to break the news and I hate the thought of that magic being gone. But this letter will make it definitely easier. It's beautiful and of course made me cry. I found it here, but I will copy it to this post so you don't have to go anywhere if you don't want to.
Dear Lucy,
Thank you for your letter. You asked a very good question: “Are you Santa?”
I know you’ve wanted the answer to this question for a long time, and I’ve had to give it careful thought to know just what to say.
The answer is no. I am not Santa. There is no one Santa.
I am the person who fills your stockings with presents, though. I also choose and wrap the presents under the tree, the same way my mom did for me, and the same way her mom did for her. (And yes, Daddy helps, too.)
I imagine you will someday do this for your children, and I know you will love seeing them run down the stairs on Christmas morning. You will love seeing them sit under the tree, their small faces lit with Christmas lights.
This won’t make you Santa, though.
Santa is bigger than any person, and his work has gone on longer than any of us have lived. What he does is simple, but it is powerful. He teaches children how to have belief in something they can’t see or touch.
It’s a big job, and it’s an important one. Throughout your life, you will need this capacity to believe: in yourself, in your friends, in your talents and in your family. You’ll also need to believe in things you can’t measure or even hold in your hand. Here, I am talking about love, that great power that will light your life from the inside out, even during its darkest, coldest moments.
Santa is a teacher, and I have been his student, and now you know the secret of how he gets down all those chimneys on Christmas Eve: he has help from all the people whose hearts he’s filled with joy.
With full hearts, people like Daddy and me take our turns helping Santa do a job that would otherwise be impossible.
So, no. I am not Santa. Santa is love and magic and hope and happiness. I’m on his team, and now you are, too.
I love you and I always will.
Mama
PS. I hope your day is better than mine!
3 comments:
I'm sorry it was a horrible day. I hear ya about the benefits and kids growing up so fast. Noel's company cut his way back and it IS definitely NOT easy!
I loved when my kids were little. It was so much fun and I miss it a lot. It's okay to be sad. You're a great mom!
Thanks a lot! Andrea is still years and years away from the Santa reveal but your post still made me cry!
Hey thank you so much for the idea for the letter about Santa. My boy is getting to be the age that he is not sure he believes in Santa any more and I was not sure how to go about telling him but this is a really neat way to do it and still keep the magic about Christmas. I have not left comments before but I read all the time. Keep posting I love the ideas that you give. You seem like a great mommy to me. Libby Peterson Murphy
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